Breeding joy, joy, people's love and righteousness

Educational skills

The joy of Eid... Do you need education?

“The fasting person has two joys: joy when he breaks his fast and joy when he meets his Lord.”

What is joy and do we practice it on our holidays as we should?

Joy is one of the manifestations of happiness: it includes an internal feeling and an external expression. The internal feeling is an overwhelming positive feeling that overflows the features and radiates from the looks, and its expression on the faces is marked by smiles and joy.

A questioner may ask when he is stopped by the title of the article: Do we need to teach children how to be happy?

Spontaneous joy is born with children, but it often diminishes with the stages of life. We may also unintentionally contribute to diminishing the feelings of joy and its expressions through what we often say to our children unnecessarily, sometimes from “No” to “Hurry” (Don’t stain your clothes), thus eliminating the joy of discovery and achievement. Which immerses them as they learn from life situations, which does not cause harm if they are left to practice them, but requires effort and patience from us, even in happy seasons and occasions, we fear that their clothes will get dirty or their grooming will be disturbed, and we want them to remain like mummified people.

The reality of our contemporary life makes us need to learn and teach many innate things that could have appeared and grown in intimate social settings, but with the absence of the required communication within the family and the decline in awareness of the children’s needs and our role towards them, we have come to call for learning and teaching emotional and social skills, and if we decide to... We teach our children to be happy. Let us start with ourselves. Our children reflect what they tell us through our actions more than our instructions.

We must first ask ourselves, where is joy located in our lives? Do we experience feelings of joy in our daily lives, or are we too busy and stressed, consumed by many small details? We do not have time to feel the joy emanating from deep within us until it overflows on our faces and radiates from our looks. Do we stop to enjoy the beauties of our surrounding environment, the beauty of roses... the sky... The stars, do we feel that they provide us with a feeling that fills our conscience with freshness and activity? Do we enjoy the beauty of childhood or do we tend to feel sorry for the costs of care? Do we give ourselves free rein to live in their world? Or do we sit with them reluctantly, fearing that our time will be wasted in idle play, and then we soon leave them and become absorbed in the costs of life?

On the other hand, some say: How can we be happy when Muslims are suffering everywhere? ..Is it necessary for Muslims to share their feelings in order for the joy to disappear from our holidays? Here are our brothers in Palestine presenting a model of Eid joy despite the wounds and over the rubble. The joy of Eid is worship. The law of God has required human nature to be prepared to manage emotions according to life’s situations and requirements. Every emotion has a role in achieving psychological balance. Man needs joy to provide himself with energy and vitality. It requires pauses of sadness and the evaluation of reality that they contain, and so on for all other emotions...

What are the methods of expressing joy that we mean? Islam has taught us to clearly express our joy through declaring “Allahu Akbar”, sharing with people, giving (charity), congratulating, visiting, and maintaining family ties, which indicates that the joy of Eid goes beyond the individual feeling to collective joy, but it did not specify for us a specific method of expression. It's up to our creativity.

Nowadays, people pray for the holidays of the past, and some of them look forward to non-Muslim holidays in which they seek expressions of joy... Why don’t we take a calendar stand with our holidays and make a plan for happy holidays filled with the joy that our religion has directed us to live in these virtuous days? Are our holiday celebrations satisfactory? For our generations? Anyone who follows the opinions of youth and children notices dissatisfaction among many of them, and they often ask to travel during Eid and not participate in family programs, most of which do not go beyond regular visits and outings to parks.

Every time has its own styles and developments, and joy in Eid is not an alternative to this, but some of us insist on adhering to a stereotypical image of Eid that is met with resistance from many children as they see the nations of the earth on screens holding festivals and arranging celebrations, which makes us think about developing our expressions and giving them a creative touch that does not deviate from our originality. Our distinction is that we do not want to imitate the Christians. We have our own original and enjoyable methods that only require that we prepare for the Eid with joy in order to bring it to reality so that we can be happy with the Eid and make those around us happy.

One of the most important meanings of joy that we must pay attention to is: teaching children what to be happy about? Children rejoice in the Eid with gifts, and in the midst of joy over the gifts and Eid gifts, we may not pay attention to the most important factor that we must focus on, which is the joy of achievement (performing worship). “Say, ‘By the grace of God and His mercy, so let them rejoice. It is better than what they gather.’”

The other important meaning of the Eid is to share in the feelings of joy and work to spread them, and that everyone’s concern should not be to make himself happy, to communicate with his family and to honor them.

How do we convey these meanings to children? The best way to convey these meanings is through Eid arrangements and the planning they include to make these few days carry great benefits and beautiful memories. The following steps can be suggested:

✓ Advance cognitive preparation through information such as stories and anecdotes about Eid, its meanings and goals, Islam and its approach to spreading joy, and focusing on family participation, family ties, and charity.

✓ Involve children and give them roles in Eid preparations, with encouragement and cooperation, without accountability or blame.

✓ Early preparation by buying new clothes and arranging them in a beautiful way, so that their appearance adds enthusiasm and joy from the beginning of the preparation for Eid.

✓ Caring for Eid gifts:

• Gifts for children: Buying gifts early, wrapping them in an elegant way, and writing cards for the children to congratulate them on the achievements they achieved in Ramadan or before it, and the services they provided, thanking them for them, highlighting their advantages, and urging them to advance further. It is important that the gifts be what the children dream of, provided that it is not stressful. For the family budget.

• Gifts for visitors: Purchasing a variety of gifts in elegant bags for the visitors. The children work on preparing, dividing and wrapping them, and preparing for the occasion of their distribution and the accompanying activities.

• Eid prayer gifts: Preparing bags of sweets containing some riyals to be distributed to children during Eid prayer, to train our children to take steps to make others happy.

✓ Preparing for the Eid day: with everything that enhances the joy:

• Witness the Eid prayer and enjoy seeing Muslims gathering to participate in the Awards Day and enhance this meaning.

• Preparing dates in the shapes preferred by family members and sweets, and preparing a tape with takbeers and Eid songs.

✓ Arranging visits to family, friends and family ties, by developing a program with the children’s participation.

✓ Determine charity to distribute to the needy or send to charitable organizations.

✓ Preparing for a family trip to enhance the atmosphere of friendship between children and spouses, after the end of the first days of Eid.

✓ Explain the idea of ​​Eidiya? For some, it has taken on an abnormal dimension. Some children have begun to beg for it from their families, and get angry if it falls below their expectations. The children must understand that it is a symbolic gift, and that the principle is not to expect financial gifts from anyone, and that the Eid has a special character, and it is possible through planning for the Eid. Discussing the spending of the Eid gift, allocating some of it to the poor, buying a gift for a friend, and buying some items that they are looking forward to.

These were some thoughts about the feelings of joy and spreading them in the Eid atmosphere. There is no doubt that the honorable readers have many ideas and innovations that just need to be launched and activated so that our Eid this year will be different from the previous ones, and our children will emerge from it with a deep emotional experience of faith. . . Happy new year.

Dr.. Sahar bint Abdul Latif Kurdi

Family and child counselor