Children's Education Conviction

Educational skills

Teaching a child contentment

Our demands have increased and the luxuries in our lives have turned into necessities, and this has been reflected in our children. The one has seven dolls and insists on asking for a doll every time she sees one. The other has dozens of cars and cries in sadness because he did not get the car he liked in the toy store or the new version of the electronic games. It is a bad phenomenon and a dangerous indicator for those who want their children to have a happy life. We must pay attention to that. A person’s feeling of deprivation and lack despite having many things spoils a person’s livelihood and disturbs his life. In contrast to a person who rejoices in the blessings he has, appreciates them, and feels satisfied even Even if it is few, which is what we call contentment, and in the past they said contentment is an inexhaustible treasure, then what is contentment and is it synonymous with asceticism? Contentment is sometimes interpreted as contentment, and it includes submission, which is a pleasant feeling that makes a person feel that he has enough, and then the feeling of lack and need disappears and he becomes content. As for asceticism, it indicates a lack of desire for worldly pleasures, and a little asceticism. Here we suffice with contentment, which is the lowest degree of asceticism.

Contentment is a learned behavior that a person acquires from the environment. Among the most prominent influences in teaching a child contentment are the following:

• Role models: If the parents are not characterized by contentment and buy a lot of things they do not need, then what will be the condition of the children? We often see families going out shopping, and they are tempted by restaurants, and they may not be hungry, so they sit down to eat and ask for various types of food, then they get up after tasting what is small. How much we need to apply the principle of our master Omar. Or whenever you crave, you buy.”

• Paying attention to developing the aspect of faith so that the child realizes that there are things that are much more important than all the things in this world, and they are the blessing of Islam. If man was created for worship, then whoever attains the greatest blessings is a Muslim. The Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, did not have much, but he was the happiest of people. He understood that life is not measured by what a person has in it, but rather by gratitude to the Creator, Glory be to Him, for the blessings He bestowed upon him, the first of which is the blessing of Islam, and that what he has is better and more lasting.

• Reading with your children about the biography of the Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, and the stories of the righteous to learn about examples of asceticism and contentment.

• Reducing the influence of the temptations that satellite channels contribute to, including programs and advertisements that encourage buying and acquisition. Determining what channels and programs children watch is important if we want the seeds of contentment to grow.

• Teaching contentment through lessons of deprivation - which does not mean deprivation of necessities - which develops and strengthens faith, in contrast to a luxurious life in which a person does not make an effort to achieve what he wants.

• Paying attention to the type of company with which the children meet, as people of luxury and entertainment destroy the buds of contentment in the children and drag them into many temptations that exceed their needs.

• Teaching children to look at people according to their qualities and deeds, not their possessions and expenses, and that a simple life can be enjoyable if its owner is satisfied and loved, while a luxurious life can be miserable if it loses good relationships, and to look at those who are below them and not at those who are above them.

• Training in gratitude is a path to contentment. When going on an outing, some children may declare that they did not enjoy it because they wanted to stay longer, or because their friend so-and-so did not attend, or because such-and-such things were not available. Gratitude must be learned, and this can be done by preparing the children. In advance, “Dad will take us to the park. He will do his best to make us happy. Sometimes we prefer to stay longer and this makes us forget the fun time we spent and look at what did not happen, so we return home sad instead of happy. Today I want to see who is the winner, who comes back happy and thanks to his father for the outing.” Beautiful and does not pay attention to what he missed.

• Pay attention when encouraging children to win and compete so that this does not come at the expense of “love for your brother what you love for yourself.” One of the lessons of contentment is to accept others’ participation in goodness and be content with your share, not looking forward to what you missed from what others won.

• For our children to understand the meaning of how the world is in our hands and not in our hearts, so that joy over what we have been given does not make us proud, nor do we look forward to what is not in our hands, nor do we grieve over what we have lost.

• Training in dealing with money is one of the important matters in this context, as the son is given an allowance that he saves and spends from so that he feels responsible and in control of buying what he needs.

• Our children should know that daily circumstances are not always favorable, and many of what we like may not be present in them. Conviction is necessary to face different living conditions.

Sometimes some parents resort to fulfilling all their children’s desires under the pretext of satisfying them so that they do not aspire to what others have. The truth is that contentment does not stem from possessing something that pleases or the occurrence of something that pleases. How many people have we seen who say that if I had obtained such or such or done such or become such and such, I would have been the happiest of people. Once he gets what he wants, he starts again, and this is part of the nature of the human soul unless it undergoes refinement. The poet says:

            The soul is willing, if it desires it, and if it is given to a little, it is satisfied

Therefore, whoever wants to leave his children rich, let him teach them contentment. The Prophet, may God bless him and grant him peace, explained this meaning to us in his saying, “Wealth is not the abundance of wealth, but wealth is the richness of the soul,” and the truth of the proverb is that contentment is an inexhaustible treasure.

Dr.. Sahar bint Abdul Latif Kurdi

Family and child counselor